Angry Vita Theater: The Naruto One
by Onion Riffs
Summary: The Sunday Afternoon series continues with a new title. In this episode, Vita discovers a strange Naruto fic...


_Vita had grown to enjoy her Sunday afternoon activities. In fact, Vita no longer waited for Sunday to come. Whenever she had some free time, she could be found on the computer, looking for something to mock for Hayate's enjoyment._

_One such day, she discovered Naruto fanfiction. It wasn't long before she found a target…_

_I don't really know too much about Naruto. I know there are ninjas, and one of them wears orange and that makes no sense. But this story caught my eye. So I'm going to rip it a new one._

A/n

Me: okay, i know i have like to many storys,

_Yes, I know you have too many "storys"._

and that i need to work for school.

Saso: it is a normal school day.

_Wait, what?_

Dei: why do you even want to write?

_Is the author talking to the characters from the show in the author's note?_

Me: BECAUSE ME HEAD WILL EXPLODE IF I DON'T!

_... Please stop writing._

Dei: -

Me: don't even say it, but yeah, I still have like 15 more ideas, and I just love neko's so:

NEKO LOVE! Disclaimer: I still don't own naruto or nekos.

_You don't own cats? Okay, what does that have to do with anything?_

-Neko Love – prologue.

Nekos. They are really normal in these days, it is the year 2564,

_Why yes, cats are normal. I'd assume they'd stay normal in the future, too._

and there were flying cars and all the other things,

_All the other things? What are these other things, author?_

but also did people have tails again, or at least 20 %.

_Wait, what? Why?_

The so called nekos.

_People with tails aren't cats, author, are you that stupid?_

Nekos are stronger and faster then humans. First did the people and nekos live in piece, that was until the new president said that nekos aren't humans anymore but just animals. Monsters. Somewhere the man was true, if nekos want something they will do everything to get it. even killing there best friends,

_At first this made no sense, but if these people are going around murdering their best friends they probably should get locked up._

as soon as this little fact came out, did the president put on a special team, that caught the nekos. This work good, it was just a matter of time before almost all of them were caught. But, not all of them. There was the akatsuki, but not whole akatsuki was a neko,

_A whole group of people can't be one cat, I'm glad the fanfic author understands this concept._

there where 4 humans there, all of them would sacrifice everything for there nekos,

_Why would you sacrifice anything for a group of murderers with tails?_

in total were there 4 humans and 5 nekos in akatsuki. All had there own believes and rules, but they helped each other with out problems, or story starts on a day in there lives, when the special team found them.

_I'm starting to think a cat typed this, since the spelling and grammar is below human levels._

A guy with a red tail and red hair watched at his friends who were all training, he wasn't in the mood to train and walked into the house, seeing a blue haired woman 'hey Konan.'

_THE BARBARIAN_

He said, so called woman turned around and smiled 'hey Sasori, I didn't know that you guys were done already' Sasori **chook his head**

_Sasori strangled himself._

'we aren't, it is only me. I just didn't feel like training anymore.' Konan smiled and told Sasori that he could help her then, Sasori just nodded and covered the table. As soon as he was done he was send upstairs to get the others for dinner, Sasori walked trough a hale way to the bedrooms,

_Let's all take a walk trough a hale way!_

he first knocked on a blue door, 'Itachi, dinner in 5 minutes.' After that he went to a green door, 'Tobi! Be a good boy and go help Konan with the rest of the dinner' Sasori took a step back and a guy with a orange mask run out of the room, yelling that he was a good boy,

_It's common knowledge that Tobi is completely insane._

after that Sasori went to a white door he didn't bother to knock and just walked in, 'Hidan.' He looked around and saw the boy asleep on the bed, covered in blood,

_See, psychopathic murderers. I mean, he's covered in blood!_

Sasori looked around and saw, what he thought, was a **death deer** he sighed,

_You've always got to look out for those death deer._

'Hidan!' so called man rose 'what?' Sasori sighed 'food in 5 minutes.' After said that, did Sasori walk away again he walked towards Konan and said 'I will pass dinner today, I think it is better if I do go train a little.' After said this he walked away hearing Konan yell that he should call the rest inside, Sasori did this and was soon alone outside he looked around and walked towards a tree, pulled of his shirt and throw it in the tree, knowing that the shirt will be destroyed if he would keep it on,

_What kind of training is he doing? Shirt-ripping exercises?_

after a short 15 minutes of training was the sun starting to set. Sasori hated this time of the day, it was the time that nekos couldn't sence everything.

_Uh... why? That doesn't make any sense. Cats have good eyesight at night._

So he decided it was smart to go back inside, he was halfway his way to the tree with his shirt when he heard a branch breaking behind him, Sasori turned around, looking for something that didn't belong there. Seeing noting, he turned again but this time he heard something spring from the trees behind him, when he turned he was face to face with a tiger,

_TIGER OUT OF FREAKING NOWHERE!_

and not just a tiger, but by the look of it one of the special team,

_Yes, the tiger is an official member of a team created by the government. I wonder if it wears a uniform._

Sasori just knew how to dodge it, and before he could warn the others he felt the tiger scratched his chest, and he felt back.

_Then he died. The end._

Nekos were stronger then humans, but not stronger then some animals, smarter and so be able to defeat them but not stronger, and sometimes not even faster.

_CATS ARE SO MUCH BETTER THEN HUMANS RIGHT? This story is stupid._

Sasori felt against a tree

_This fanfic pairs Sasori and a tree._

and next thing he felt was that someone putted a collar around his neck, Sasori felt that his body started to change "fuck. Not the collar." The special team had special collars for nekos.

_Well, putting a collar on your cat is probably a good idea._

If a neko get one of those around his neck he will change into a animal.

_Well, __**obviously**__. That makes perfect sense._

Sasori felt that this was happening and let out a last roar to let the rest know that there was something wrong, and that they had to run, akatsuki was strong, but not one member can defeat the special team alone. Everything went black for Sasori.

_He died. The end._

A/n

Me: done.

Saso: this is your shortest thing ever.

_I'd hate to see anything longer from this author._

Dei: yes it is.

Me: well. I want to know what the people think about it before I work more on it,

_It's horrible._

and I have to have dinner.

Saso: no wonder that you had dinner time in it.

Me: shut up

Dei: R&R

_That was freaking terrible. And the "heroes" were outright stated to be murderers! Who the hell would want to read about a bunch of unsympathetic murderers? I know __I'd__ never want to._


End file.
